Saturday, October 01, 2005

And Now For Something Completely Different.

Pat: Look, I know we have our differences. But I think we can all come together tonight, and say suck it Cleveland! And screw you Yankees!

Tim: Oh, yeah, your precious White Sox sure pulled off a hell of a feat beating those Indians. I mean, they only spend just over half of what you do on your team. And you did only have a 15-game lead to cushion yourself with.

Pat: Hey, we earned that lead, we were allowed to spend it as we like. But now the collapse is over, and we're schooling the Indians like we should have been doing all August and September. And we've still got the best record in the AL. Heck, we'll *end* with the best record in the AL. And as for salary, your Cubs outspend us by $12,000,000 a year. And how's that losing record working out for you?

Tim: Hey, have fun being swept in the first round. The way I see it, this is just God stringing you along a little longer before crushing your heart. Again. And next year you can watch it all over again. I mean, it's not like you'll have any trouble getting tickets to that empty thing you call a ballpark. Hint: real ballparks have fans.

Pat: And real fans watch the god-damned game, not just babble on their cell phones like a certain blue-wearing mass of yuppies I know of.

Tim: Hey, you don't judge me by the yuppies who sit next to me, and I won't judge you by the all the people not sitting next to you.

Pat: Fine. Still, I think we can all come together and say...screw the Yankees. They better not win it again this year. God-damned Yankees.

Tim: Yeah, fine, God-damned Yankees, whatever.


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